Horrible Album Covers

Every once in a while you come across album covers (or any cover art) that are just so horrible that they absolutely rule; then again, however, some of them just make you scratch your head and wonder what the hell they were thinking. “So bad it’s good” might not apply to some of the worst of the worst.

In this article I will shine some light on some of the worst and most horribly hilarious and awful album covers that I know of. You just might feel every single emotion from “lol” to “facepalm.”

I Am the Night by Pantera (1985)

Honestly, any of the Pantera album covers from the pre-Phil Anselmo days can be used, but out of all of them, this one makes me wonder what the hell it is the most. Got any ideas? I’m just glad this happened in the ’80s, where it is at least somewhat acceptable. No way they could go from the cover of “Cowboys from Hell to this shit.

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Ultra Beatdown by DragonForce (2008)

Are you freaking kidding me? One of the only good things about DragonForce was their ability to at least have pretty epic album covers, but what is this shit?! A futuristic women with a lancer? And what the hell is up with the name of the album? They go from stuff like “Valley of the Damned,” “Sonic Firestorm,” “Inhuman Rampage” to… Ultra Beatdown? It’s like a stereotypical cliche gone wrong.

It looks like they are trying to be a concept for a game by ripping off a hybrid of sorts between Gears of War and Unreal Tournament!

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Anthology by Manowar (1997)

Is there really anything that is needed to be said?

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Dance of Death by Iron Maiden (2003)

If there was a poll on the biggest album mindfuck — this one takes the cake. Through the years of Maiden’s epic covers with their mascot Eddie on the front, they come out with this shit? I really am speechless. It isn’t that I don’t have a lot to say, its the fact that it I can’t even get it out! It looks like the band broke up and then the janitor of the studio somehow got the the rights to use the name and logo. Just what is going on in that art?!

To be fair, the “history” of this cover can be summarized as follows: artist David Patchett designed the art, but wasn’t completely satisfied with the results in the incomplete form and was going to finish it to be better, but the band ended up using the prototype art as the final art for some reason unbeknownst to anybody in existence, despite the quality and errors in the art itself. Patchett even asked for his name to be removed from the credits of his own art!

Well, there we go! Thank you, Iron Maiden, for going with one of, if not the worst album art in the history of mankind. If I had a medal, I’d give it to you. Maybe it would have floating, CGI masked babies on it, maybe not.

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“The Spaghetti Incident?” by Guns N’ Roses (1993)

First off, I love how they put the title in quotations and have a question mark at the end. I think it really shows that they knew people would be asking it in their mind, so they just went with the ironic thing to do. Then they put a picture of disgusting-looking spaghetti on the front to symbolize the bad taste that the music will leave if you listen to it, apparently.

They accomplished all of that with this album and its cover. No wonder Chinese Democracy is taking so long to be released. Axl is trying to figure out a way to fuck it up!

Next up are some miscellaneous ones that didn’t quite make the cut. Or simply, I couldn’t find much to write about them, or much history about them at all. Some honorable mentions:

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It looks like it could be turned into a Disney movie.

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This idiot fails on so many levels. The artist’s name is horrible. His ‘nickname’ is horrible. His album name is horrible. His album pose is horrible.

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One Response to “Horrible Album Covers”

  1. Destruction-Overdrive Says:

    I wonder what the finished Dance of Death would look like. I have to agree it looks shit. Great album though.

    LOL @ everything Manowar does.

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